Office of the Independent Blogger

If I have one, just one, embarrassing-but-other-people-say-it’s-adorable-habit, it’s The Seal Clap. When something hilarious is said, or something clever done, I’ve been known to clap a couple of times like a seal. When I was younger, I wrote a story entitled Drunk Penguin and it was set in Arctic Ice City, with the villain being Seal E. Despite my casting of a seal as villain, I hold no ill will toward seals, and like George Bush seeks to save the whales, I seek to save the seals. I’d heard, before, about people “clubbing” baby seals to death, but I never realized how widespread it was — or how much brutality seals face from “hunters” — until a friend contacted me about it.

Take this story, for instance, about seals being clubbed brutally in Namibia, and the practice of slaughtering seals goes on even in Canada. I’m no PETA-ninite, and I am not a vegetarian. I just think that there are certain things that are simply wrong, and the pictures at this site are disturbing, and I’m not the only one who thinks so: in 1972, fur taken from clubbed Cape seals was made illegal in the United States, and the practice banned. For all of Canada’s positives, in this regard, it is backward. Just goes to show that Liberalism in governments worldwide comes in all sorts of packages.

If you’d care to have updates on the fight for protection of Seals, go on ahead and join the group and myself. It’s absolutely disgusting. Absolutely.

Happy fourth of July, everyone. May all your days be filled with joy, fireworks and fun. On this day five years ago, I split my right index finger open by accident, and had to have my tendons surgically repaired, and then I needed rehab for my right hand. However, I grew bored with the slow pace of rehab, and rehabbed myself at home three times as quick as what they told me it would take. That is my personal anecdote of the day (note: don’t expect that to become a daily thing). It’s a busy day for me, as every fourth is for every American, but I’ve still got to weigh in on a couple of things.

North Korea test-fired missiles again, the first test since 1998, and it comes as no surprise to me, or anyone, really, as this has been expected for weeks, at the least. Stephen Hadley labeled the tests by their obvious name, “Provocative,” and that’s about it. The long-range missile apparently failed, and that is about the end of it. It doesn’t appear to me that the Bush Administration is going to set fireworks off in the direction of Pyongyang, and that’s how it should be. Let’s stay calm with this. It’s just a test, after all, and an attempt to get attention by the Norkean Madonna. (”Norkean” is a word I created for North Korean.)

The next thing I wanted to talk about today is this, the news that an asteroid nearly collided with the Earth. Let’s keep that in mind whenever we’re about to solve a problem. Go outside, at the beach, down a hill, and look at all the rocks. They’ve been here for thousands of years. We’re just passing through. Take time to be happy and calm, and have a safe holiday.

The Congressional Republican Leadership has made the decision to kill immigration reform, and it’s a misguided mercy killing. The bill was draining the Party politically, as the Right Wing demanded nothing short of a Wall and the criminalization of conversation with illegal immigrations, while the Senate, Democrats and George Bush wanted nothing but and tenderness for migrants. Republicans have made the calculation that this sort of in-fighting and constant jockeying for position was detrimental to their chances in 2006, and so they have killed the bill. It’s a flawed calculation on their part, however, as nothing is more likely to depress Republican turnout this year than having no immigration bill. The Grand Old Party wanted a Grand Old Reform (something dating back to 1960s Berlin, or 1880s America) and didn’t get it. And so the Grand Old Party won’t be getting the votes they’re used to getting.

Let me state, momentarily, that I love Korea — both Koreas. Their history is fascinating, and I think their situation to be the most complex, worst problem in the world today. A people split by foreign powers who took different paths but ultimately need to be reunited. When the day comes that I travel the world, I want to go to Eastern Europe (Ukraine, Russia, Turkey) and then the Orient, particularly the Koreas. Now that my love for the East is stated, let me say that I’ve been following the Korean crisis for years, and that North Korea’s recent threats to launch a missile test don’t quite bother me.

To be sure, it’s creepy. Kim Jung Il is the world’s biggest creep this side of John Bolton, and so it’s natural to expect this sort of behavior from him. Unless we intend to give him a lot of diplomatic assurances, money and food — or if we take the hardest road and invade — there’s little leverage that we have. Kim Jung Il is unlikely to be anything more than the Madonna of international politics — an attention whore, and not much else. If he does test his missile, I’m tempted to discount its significance. We’ve known that he can build missiles and shoot them into the Sea of Japan since 1998. What, exactly, changes? Just because he kisses Britney Spears twice doesn’t mean he’s not the same old attention whore from the late 1990s.

Ultimately, the situation in Korea is one that will have to be resolved by politicians being statesmen. Provided that, if (and likely when) the Koreans test a missile again, the proper response is verbal condemnation, and that’s about it. There’s no reason for Japan to begin re-arming, no cause for American threats, no need to worry in Seoul. Kim Jung Il is creepy, not crazy. As long as the West and its Eastern Allies keep a cool head when the missile launches, everything should work out. There’s no reason to go on a warpath unless Jung assaults Korea or Japan. A test meant to show the world that he’s not a joke is something to ignore, not a reason to get your war on. Stay calm and the storm will pass.

I’d like to take this space to tip my hat to Representative Ginny Brown-Waite, a sophomore in the House who took the courageous action of introducing a bill declaring House offices not off-limits to subpoenas. House Speaker Hastert doesn’t like it, and I’ll share a dorky anecdote of mine with you. During the Chicago Debate League’s season, we had to debate whether or not to overturn the Korematsu Supreme Court ruling, and my partner told the Judge, “You know, this type of tool is not a good one to have for future leaders to have, because we don’t know what kind of man might come to office. If Bush and Cheney dies, Hastert becomes President, and we all know he’s tyrannical.” I just about had a heart attack because I thought it might offend the judge — and because I thought it untrue — but upon further review, it made the Judge smile (I distinctly remember that) and it was true! Hastert believes he’s above the law.

Earlier in the week, I complained that Arlen Specter was a hack, in more words, and he continues to be one. Now he’s involved in a game of footsie with Dick Cheney, who has told him that the NSA doesn’t need Congressional approval. How Imperial but true, considering that this Congress — and this lowly Chairman — don’t have the nerve to stand up to the Administration. Specter says that there’s “no doubt” that the program is breaking the Law, which makes me wonder why he’s not doing more. He’s introduced a bill that would just about rip down the program as it stands, but it’s not going anywhere because of a puppy dog Congress. What a shame it is, then, that Specter is holding half-hearted hearings, as if he put real effort into the hearings and sought to discredit and humiliate them with half the passion with which he smeared Anita Hill, then real progress would be made.

As it stands, I consider his efforts minor, and insincere.

We’ll leave it at that for today, as I’ve a Chemistry final to study for. But before I go, a few words of wisdom that President Bush must repeat every day: numbers are not your friend.