Moscow Ramirez or: Dreadlock Diplomacy
Sunday, August 17th, 2008Excerpt one:
The United States on Sunday accused Russia of stalling its military pullback in Georgia, but the Bush administration is not rushing to repudiate Moscow for its actions.
The White House is struggling to figure out the best way to penalize Russia. It doesn’t want to deeply damage existing cooperation on many fronts or discourage Moscow from further integrating itself into global economic and political institutions. At the same time, U.S. officials say Russia can’t be allowed to get away with invading its neighbor.
Excerpt two:
The best-known dreadlocks in these parts got a little shorter Thursday.
Heeding the request of his manager, Manny Ramirez got a haircut, but as teammate Jeff Kent said with a smile, holding his thumb and forefinger about an inch apart: “Yeah, about that much.” “One inch, half-an-inch,” Ramirez said. “It’s still long. If I come back next year, it will be shorter.”
The slugging outfielder, a free agent after this season, said a local barber did the job. “One of my friends recommended him,” Ramirez said, adding it took “maybe five minutes, 10 minutes.”
After the Dodgers acquired Ramirez from the Boston Red Sox on July 31, manager Joe Torre said he asked Ramirez to “clean it up a little bit.” “I was in the principal’s office right now,” Ramirez said upon emerging from Torre’s office some three hours before the Dodgers faced the Philadelphia Phillies. “(Torre) told me he’s fine, for now.”
If you stop and consider these two news stories and the recent histories of Russia and Manny Ramirez, you can see the similarities. The United States has tolerated Russia’s activities since the Soviet Union collapsed but the relationship is straining under the combined pressure of needing to act but being incapable of acting due to the positives a strong Russia brings to the table while Manny Ramirez had tried the Red Sox’ patience for years until they finally traded him. Through much of his tenure in Boston the organization and its fans shrugged off all his exploits as “Manny being Manny” but could not shrug it off forever. We have been doing the same, shrugging “Russia being Russia” for years but it is a bond that is straining. The comparison goes deeper if you look further: the Red Sox put Ramirez on waivers several years ago, waivers being a process whereby anyone can claim a player but they have to take on his contract completely and unconditionally, owing him all the money due to him as a result. Our attempt to sanction the Russians and our inability to do so is a functional equivalent of this process. Next thing you know, they’ll be signing billion dollar contracts with Halliburton just like Ramirez will be signing a hundred million dollar deal with some team this offseason.
It’s good to be out of your mind but powerful no matter what the field, eh?